It’s all about the lighting

February 3, 2026 //
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Y’all remember that whole kerfuffle about the white & gold dress that was actually blue & black? (Yes, it was. The store that sold the dress actually had to tell people)

According to the wikipedia, the lighting in the photo was the reason that there was a difference in the color perception. Which is wild, right? Like, how crazy the lighting must be to see blue as white/black as gold. Luckily, the Wikipedia showed what had happened, so I didn’t spend the rest of my life obsessing over it. And I’m sure the people in my life who know me best are ALSO grateful.

TO BE FAIR THOUGH, this is why/how I have so many random fun facts! Like how Dick became a nickname for Richard! The TL;DR version: back in ye olde days people shortened names because they didn’t have predictive text wrote everything by hand AND humans can be whimsical, they liked to rhyme. So, Richard became Ric(k) became Dic(k). Personally, this is not how I choose nicknames – it’s a little more complicated, but a lot more accurate. They’re more like the blue/black dress. If the lighting is right, you can definitely see how I got to white/gold.

I know. Seems weird to be talking about rhyming when these emails are about HISTORY. Here’s the thing! It has been said that history doesn’t repeat itself, but it can rhyme. I know that slave patrols à Police à Immigration & Customs Enforcement do not rhyme, but HEAR ME OUT:

Slave Patrols (also known as slave catchers) were armed white men who were tasked with controlling movement of enslaved people by preventing protests rebellions, returning runaways, and enforcing broken windows policing* slave codes by using surveillance and organized terror. It also provided a form of discipline for the enslaved, who were subject to summary justice outside the law. They monitored gatherings like dances and immigration hearings church services, stopped Black people without passes from their enslavers, and administered immediate punishments like whipping. Once returned to their enslavers, more physical and psychological violence ensued, including intentional breakup of families, and deprivation of food and other necessities.

In some areas, enslavers offered incentives like student loan repayment/signing bonuses as incentives. Wait..*checks notes* I meant TAX INCENTIVES AND TOBACCO. ¡Discúlpeme! In others, governments legally compelled white men to form slave patrols to patrol specific areas to pReVenT CrIMes aNd iNsuRRecTiOn by the enslaved against the white community in the antebellum South. Without warrant or permission, slave patrols could enter the home of anyone—Black or white—suspected of sheltering the escaped enslaved (I am breaking the 4th wall to look directly at you, reader). According to the American Bar Association, in modern times (like today, right now in 2026), this would be a clear violation of the Fourth Amendment and constitute an illegal search.

FUN FACT: During the Civil War, some men that were turned away from the army but still wanted to be able to brutalize people ended up taking places within ICE slave patrols.

Anyway. When the south LOST the Civil War, southern whites were still mad at black people for not wanting to be enslaved now “afraid” of Black people due to reconstruction governments being perceived as oppressive to the south (because they were no longer allowed to legally oppress Black people? Maybe it was just the lighting? Who’s to say?). Almost immediately, informal patrols reactivated, reviving patrolling practices that targeted free men. And THOSE informal patrols developed into southern police departments, and so continued the systematic surveillance, and the enforcement of curfews (and the violence against Black people). And because they were inherently racists, they definitely had beliefs on who could become a police officer. Though a small number of African Americans joined the police force in the South during Reconstruction, they met active resistance. Did you know that in 2025, an LA police officer working in the recruiting office secretly recorded conversations in which fellow cops were being racist/homophobic/misogynistic? In case you were thinking this was just the south. AND JUST LAST YEAR LAPD was also using tear gas to disperse protests, which is classified as a chemical weapon under the Geneva Conventions and banned even in warfare.

Are you asking yourself This is not my beautiful house how does ICE fit in? SO GLAD YOU ASKED, because in theory – they shouldn’t! I looked it up! Immigration and Customs Enforcement STATED duties are locating and arresting individuals who are in the u.s. (intentionally lower case) unlawfully or have violated immigration laws, MANAGING detention and processing and repatriating foreign nationals to their home countries. They are supposed to investigate transnational crimes like human trafficking, child exploitation, financial fraud, threats to national security and illegal movement of people or goods AND investigate employers who hire undocumented workers. In fact, MOST ICE arrests are were made under “administrative warrants”. In case you were wondering, and I’m SURE you were: administrative warrants are signed by an immigration official, and only authorizes arrest and requires consent for entry into private spaces like homes; it doesn’t grant search or forced entry rights. You don’t have to open the door for an administrative warrant.

So how did we end up living in a live action simulation of call of duty? How did ICE agents end up using tear gas, sound cannons and murdering protesters on the street (oh my!) instead of administrative warrants**? I dunno. Ask the tangerine tyrant/ y’all’s president.

Actually. Speaking of tyrants, lemme back up just a little bit because I KNOW what y’all are thinking. HOW DID YOU SKIP NAZIS/BROWNSHIRTS? And my answer to you is, DID I THOUGH? Nuremburg Laws were created in 1935, VERY post Jim Crow. While the target was different *ahem* both codified systemic racism and enforced segregation. Nazi lawyers studied american Jim Crow laws for inspiration. Hitler’s Mein Kampf sings the praises of american race laws.

Also wanna point out that brownshirts original purpose was protecting nazi rallies, and EVOLVED into a violent force that used pseudo-military tactics and surveillance and intimidation/organized terror against Jews, unionists and political rivals.

:::looking off into the distance::

Also gonna say real quick that the only real difference between ICE and nazis is that ICE is bringing the gas to the people instead of the other way around. BUT THE INSPIRATION STARTED RIGHT HERE.

::whispers:: not gonna hold your hand as I say this, but plantations got a WHOLE LOT in common with concentration camps got a whole lot of rhyming with detention centers.

White supremacy -> Nazi Germany -> Police Brutality DO Rhyme and are just iterations and escalations of the same concept.

And yes,  if you tilt your head just right, that police/ice vest freshly purchased off amazon PROBABLY looks like a brown shirt. But it’s not. It’s definitely a homegrown, white american classic. (okay, yes, it probably wasn’t MADE in america but you know what I mean)

And that’s how I’m kicking off Black History Month! With History. And the reminder that all history is Black History and if people had been listening when Black people told them to we probably wouldn’t be here having it happening to others!

For the new people, Hi Hello It’s me, Wario Briya, your mostly friendly black historian here to tell you all kinds of things about Black people. If it helps, it’s usually a lot less *waves hands wildly*. BUT THIS IS THE 100TH YEAR ANNIVERSARY OF BLACK HISTORY MONTH AND YOU (the royal you) MOTHERFUCKERS HAVEN’T LEARNED A GODDAMN —  you know what. I don’t want to bounce on a bad note, so lemme give you a nice fun fact on my way out the door:

Yesterday on the first day of Black History Month, Compton legend, Pulitzer Prize winner Kendrick Lamar, aka K.Dot made Grammy History by becoming the most awarded rapper in Grammy history knocking Jay Z outta that spot (honestly for me that was the cherry on top lol)

So there you go. Two facts for the 2nd day of the 2nd month.

See y’all tomorrow! With more history and less yelling! Bye!

*broken windows policing IS modern day “slave” codes. Argue with your mama.

** nobody is illegal on stolen land AND if the us wasn’t always in other countries business destabilizing their governments maybe those people wouldn’t need to flee

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It’s nowhere NEAR the new year…

August 29, 2025 //
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Or the Reverend Doctor Martin Luther (the) King, Jr’s birthday OR EVEN FEBRUARY for that matter and here I am: Talking about ML(t)K, Jr AND Black History. WHY AM I HERE?

Great Question! Because (someone sent me this fact with no comment and I took the hint and decided to commemorate this History Fact with a little email) today marks 62 years since the March on Washington for Jobs and Freedom/ March on Washington/”I Have a Dream (or is it a Beautiful Nightmare)” speech!

The March has been credited with helping to pass the Civil Rights Act of 1964 and the passage of the Voting Rights Act of 1965.

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I feel like today*, as in 2025, as in sixty-two years ago from the original occurrence is a GREAT DAY to not just talk about the goals of this march, but also how far we’ve come! As a special treat, and because y’all know I like to show my work – I added links. But, because I love you (I do), I gave you a TL;DR version of where we at in parenthesis so that you don’t have to read the links unless you want to. You’re welcome.

  • Immediate elimination of school segregation; (Technically schools were never really NOT segregated ‘cause racially segregated neighborhoods have historically made for racially segregated schools BUT also, what if we dropped desegregation cases in the South and made it officially official?)
  • A $2-an-hour minimum wage nationwide (equivalent to $21 in 2024);(Fun Fact: It took until 1974 for the federal min wage to get to $2. In 2025,  FEDERAL minimum wage is $7.25. State minimum wages vary with the highest being DC at $17.95. So what I’m saying is if minimum wage isn’t even the equivalent of what it woulda been in 2024)
  • Authority for the Attorney General to institute injunctive suits when constitutional rights of citizens are violated. ( *breaking the fourth wall to stare directly into your soul* THIS ONLY WORKS IF THE OTHER SIDE IS PLAYING BY THE SAME RULES FOLKS)

I dunno guys. I feel like maybe we didn’t get as far as one would hoped. Maybe it’s because people don’t want freedom and equality and living wages, or civil rights. Or maybe the wheel of justice just moves slowly when one of the political parties has been actively trying to move it backwards to when “america was great” and you could enslave people. WHO’S TO SAY?

Certainly not me. I’m just here to share facts (and sometimes songs).

** Yes. I know it was actually yesterday. I STARTED this email yesterday, but I finished it today because sometimes even though I want to procrastinate, I can’t! Big Wheel keep on turnin’, IIIII gotta keep on workin’!

See y’all again the next time I feel like saying hello and sharing some facts with y’all. Or February. Whichever comes first.

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I was outside!

July 1, 2025 //
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One of my favorite girls came to LA from the DC area and I got to do something I don’t do very often. I got to play tourist. And I’m not gonna lie to you. I LOVE being a tourist in LA. And because I love it (AND she had some very specific LA things she wanted to do), I stuffed as much stuff as we could do in a long weekend (It was Juneteenth and I took the day AND the day after, off. You know this place wasn’t gonna give it to me).

A short list of things we did in 3ish days: We went to a flower shop*, to Porto’s, Warner Bros. studio tour!, a dodgers game, we took beach walks AND then we did Very Vanderpump Things™:

Sexy Unique Restaurant, or SUR – I never shoulda found out that’s what it stands for

Took pics in front of Something about Her sandwich shop – which is also a weirdly named to get a BLT (and pisses me off almost as much as Met Her at a bar as a name for a café. Why is that your name when you don’t serve booze?! Why are you tricking people?)

Dinner and drinks at TomTom’s – not weird. Two of the investors are named Tom so I see what they did there).

ALL of that was in WeHo and if my favorite lesbian is gonna do all of that, I OBVIOUSLY had to take her to the Abbey (we did NOT drink there. I would like to stay roofie free.IYKYK).

She had a great time, she said she’ll be back and next time she’s bringing the wifey and EYE said, I wanna come visit her and do touristy things because I have NEVER BEEN TO DC. And the number one thing on that my list is the Natural History Museum of African American History and Culture (while it’s still here to enjoy).

BUT HERE IS MY DILEMMA YOU GUYS. I only have two settings for this kinda thing and it is mad and sad. And NOBODY who has gone has told me that I won’t feel both of those things and maybe both at once. But also, what is the point of being a person who likes to share history if I am actively avoiding a place that even in my anger in sadness, I will probably still love because I love learning sh*t, AND I know if you don’t learn it you’re probably gonna repeat it.

LIKE FOR INSTANCE did you know that the NHMAAHC has an exhibit called “Freedom Papers” from 1852? They belong to a man named Joseph Trammel and IN THEORY, his “papers” guarded him against being enslaved as someone’s property. The exhibit’s title comes from the antebellum South.  There, free Black people produced “freedom papers” as proof of their right to move and remain safe from enslavement. But. Because these documents could be withdrawn on a whim or even ignored, Black people lived a precarious kind of freedom that was often set by others.

*looks off into the distance*

Anyway, I guess I need to gon’ and hurry up and look at some travel if I want to learn some MORE history so I can share some history. I am once again reminding all y’all that I’m just here to tell you about BLACK HISTORY** and I’m ABSOLUTELY CERTAIN that it’s just an interesting coincidence that if you tilt your head and squint your eyes, history is looking real present day these days. Just kidding you do not need to tilt or squint all you really need is eyes.

That’s my time! It’s not February and honestly, I have a crapload of work to do, but I wanted to avoid my work say hi while I was thinking of you. I’m feeling like flexing my fingers these days so the possibility of you hearing from me before February is high if I don’t get “mistaken for being Haitian and deported.

*No. I did not take her to a flower shop. Use your brain. This is a work email.

** Also gonna remind you that Black History is just HISTORY and that it seems fairly important to ALSO remind you that if one person(race/class) ain’t free, NOBODY is free.

Okay. Back to work for reals. byeeeee

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It ALMOST feels like a flashback

March 6, 2025 //
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I write SO! MANY! FACTS! that sometimes I’ll see a person in the news and I’ll ask myself how did I get here*? “Did I write a fact about this person already?”

And while I’m slightly (ha!) disorganized, my memory is pretty decent. Which is why I always have so many ridiculous stories to tell y’all.

So, when I saw a post that said I approve of both Al Greens, I thought…BOTH?!

And then I was like, I feel like I wrote about Al Green. BUT WHICH ONE?!

The answer was actually both. Sort of.

Because REALLY, I was writing a post about Alpha Phi Alpha’s Founder’s Day.

And Al Green, activist, previous President of the Houston branch of the NAACP, the US Representative from Texas’s 9th congressional district AND my mama’s hometown, who was arrested in 2012 protesting outside of the Sudanese embassy in DC with activist Martin Luther King III** (isn’t it FUNNY how protest is a first amendment right that people get arrested for when the government don’t like it? ), who presented the first articles of impeachment of 45 in 2017, and again asked to ITMFA in 2019 AND has already stated he’ll be filing articles of impeachment AGAIN (this time for suggesting the us take over the Gaza Strip) is the first lawmaker (y’all know I love a good FIRST) in modern history to be thrown out of a joint session of Congress of State of the Union address, AND a member of A phi A.

Yes. It’s March. But a) I do what I want! b) I was definitely busier this February than I expected to be and c) Black History is every day! Somebody gotta tell it to y’all since 47 is definitely tryna keep it from you!

See you next time!

*Fun Fact! I LOVE the Talking Heads because of course I do. But they were popular when I was a kid and I wasn’t really allowed to go to concerts as a kid, but seeing up and coming rappers at my local roller rink in Compton was perfectly –maybe not perfectly. we definitely had to leave early to avoid trouble *cough*gangs*cough* – okay? Anyway. I never did get to see the Talking Heads, but I DID see David Byrne who played all the old stuff at a festival with The Boy and I didn’t get to see the whole set because of conflicts, but I wouldn’t leave until after they played Burning Down the House. And YES, I am providing a random ass song that somehow seems VERY APPROPRIATE to the current events. OR, maybe I just wanted to share a couple of fun songs with y’all. MY job is just to share facts and sometimes music. YOUR job is pick up what I put down.

** I ALMOST put REVEREND in front of Martin Luther King III because I heard him speak here at the jobby job (this was the ONLY time that I was ever interested in my job’s Reverend Doctor Martin Luther (the) King, Jr day because if you want me to celebrate ML(t)K, Jr day, give me the day off or give me money!. But if you think I was going to miss hearing what ML(t)K, Jr’s middle child, you don’t know me like you think you do). I clearly remember him saying, “I am Not A Minister” but then he proceeded to PREACH DOWN, okay?!

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The Best Thing About the Super Bowl

February 18, 2025 //
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Is that even though there are a sh*t ton of Black people on the field playing every year, including BOTH quarterbacks (don’t worry! That is NOT the fact. That fact was 2 years ago, I wrote about that already, AND it was the same damn quarterbacks!), I can always find a new fact.

I didn’t watch the game because instead I was driving to the Bay Area to meet a new friend.

My team ain’t make it, so I really didn’t have a dog in this fight because technically I’m rooting for everybody black, but realistically, I’m rooting for the QB whose family does not support #47 because WTAF are you even doing?

And please miss me with everything doesn’t need to be political because it may not need to be, but it is! Especially THIS Super Bowl under THIS “president” (who does not like Diversity, Equity and Inclusion and uses the acronym DEI to mean Black people that he does not want to have D, E, OR I). Like, the Superdome even replaced “End Racism” from the end zones with a more “neutral” CHOOSE LOVE and I don’t know how these are different (yes I do. But WTF do it matter if they’re not choosing love either), but who are ME? I’m just a Black woman living in america (still does not deserve to be capitalized, in case you were wondering. That is not a typo).

THEN Pulitzer prize winner/FIRST solo rap artist to headline the Super Bowl halftime show, Kendrick Lamar and Uncle Sam(uel Jackson) came out and made political statement after political statement, then added a little razzle dazzle to another political statement by combining it with a diss* [Fun fact: “A MINOR” is both a child and a musical chord on the piano. The musical chord is all white keys] I’m only here to talk about Black History, BUT I’d like to point out that while Aubrey is, in fact, not like us – HE. SAID. THEY. He also said THEY like to sue, and I have a sneaky suspicion that again, YES, while Aubrey IS suing his label, there is a certain subset of the population who is infinitely more litigious and more likely to act fool when THEY don’t get their way, and it’s not Black people.

Anyway. While all of these are black history facts, these are not THEE Black History fact. Neither is the fact that Jalen Hurts management team is all women (they’re not all black, but 3/5ths of them are so does that make them… you know what? NEVERMIND. That’s a completely different Black History Fact.

This is a Super Bowl BHFOTD, so instead of talking about women who did NOT win a Super Bowl ring, we can talk a woman that did. No! That’s also not a typo. That’s me getting to the point of this long-ass-email (still working harder than my work filters!)

Assistant Sports Performance Coach Autumn Lockwood, who originally hails from Morgantown, W.Va** represented her home state better than they represent her as she became the first-ever black woman to win a Super Bowl ring.

Lockwood, started her athletic career as a soccer player. At University, she became a multi-time All-State selection and was named Co-Defender of the Year for the state of West Virginia in 2012 — the Hawks also captured a pair of Class AAA State Championships in girls’ soccer during her time with the program.

She followed her father to Arizona in 2012, playing soccer for the Wildcats for multiple seasons. After obtaining her undergraduate degree in Tucson and then grabbing a master’s degree at East Tennessee State, Lockwood earned multiple different jobs at the Division 1 level in numerous strength and conditioning roles.

She earned an NFL opportunity with the Atlanta Falcons after completing the Bill Walsh Diversity (there’s that pesky diversity where they wouldn’t need it if they had just been INCLUDING [black] women in the first place!) Coaching Fellowship in 2019. She interned in Atlanta while still working in collegiate sports and accepted an opportunity with the Eagles that arose while she was working with the University of Houston.

The move paid off because Autum has been on staff with the Eagles since 2022, holding multiple titles inside the organization’s strength and conditioning department. Now Lockwood has etched her name in history, forever to be acknowledged as a trailblazer amongst black women both inside her field and across the globe. It goes to show that Country Roads do indeed take you “to the place where you belong” — even if it’s not always inside these rivers and lakes that she’s used to hollers and hills.

*  Can you imagine an ENTIRE FOOTBALL STADIUM of people calling you a pdf file (sound it out, olds. Ain’t that what the kids say to avoid getting reported on social media?) since you threatened to sue if the artist did it? I don’t think that’s what he meant when he said, you better not say it.

** I woulda found this fact on my own, but I didn’t have to because , my BFF, who is ALSO a W.Va native was ready with this one while I was playing kissy face with a new baby. Additionally, I love when my facts are dropped in my lap. Because I’m lazy.

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A belated birthday!

February 12, 2025 //
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So! My oldest child (The Boy!) got married last year. He TOLD me he was eloping (like father, like son?) but I LOOKED UP the definition of eloping and the definition says: run away SECRETLY in order to get married, especially without parental consent. And first of all, he’s a grown ass man, even if I do call him “The Boy” and second of all, he didn’t NEED my consent and 17th of all, I love her and The Boy loves her so why wouldn’t I be happy for them?

BUT MORE IMPORTANTLY, he called me up to tell me that he was gonna get hitched AND made me guess the date. And lemme just say, that’s significantly harder to do when you have zero context! Is it the day you guys met? Is it between your birthdays? Is it an anniversary?

Him: Those are good guesses, mom! But no. To all of them.

HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GUESS?!

BUT I DID GUESS because I’m VERY good, but also he is VERY ridiculous and I’m not going to tell you, but I’ll give you a hint because it DOES have to do with today’s late birthday BHFOTD which is gonna be short and sweet because today’s belated birthday is about NOLA native (this is always important when yesterday the biggest sportsball game of the year was played in your hometown. YES this is me saying imma get around to a super bowl fact but it ain’t happening today, BUT ALSO it looks like the Louisiana – California pipeline works both ways ‘cause the halftime show was put on by a Cali native in NOLA) famous left-handed guitarist, songwriter and former member of The Watts 103 Rhythm Street Band AND Earth, Wind & Fire ( ß here it is you guys! There’s your hint*) with whom he was inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of fame, leader of the Al McKay All Stars band,  Albert (Al) Phillip McKay who was born on February 2, 1948.

McKay is listed in Spin in their list of the 30 most famous left-handed guitarists of all time, and he’s listed in Guitar Player at 25 on their list of the 50 greatest rhythm guitarists of all time.

This fact is brought to you by The Boy, MY favorite left-handed guitarist, who called me on February 2nd to tell me this birthday BHFOTD instead of “Hi mom, we finally had your grandbaby!” who, at this time, was already late, exactly like this fact. [Hey y’all, I’m a gigi! They finally evicted my grandson on Saturday!]

So happy birthday to that man! And my new little friend [sorry, guys. no pics until I get permission. But he is a perfect baby. No notes.]

*did you need another hint? September, by EWF was based on a music sequence developed by birthday boy, Al McKay. I promise you that I didn’t know that fact when I started writing.

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Me and Spank finally finished watching Vanderpump Rules

February 6, 2025 //
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Or at least. We finally got to Scandoval. Don’t worry. It’s unimportant, complete fluff TV, but we were determined to find out what everybody was in an uproar about.

Usually when I’m watching random TV with Spank, I’m watching reality TV. But for some reason, she chose Josie and the Pussycats [Hey! Did you know that Valerie was the 1st regularly appearing female Black character in a Saturday morning cartoon show? Now you do!]

While I was doing very light research (y’all know I continue to fly by the seat of my pants. Ish. I will sometimes write down inspiration although, how do I even know it’s gonna be inspiration because even I don’t always know where my stories are going when I start them lol), I found out this show is older than me by a couple of years! I remember watching it as a little girl and loving it, but obviously I don’t remember details because WHY does Josie’s boyfriend Alan look like Fred from Scooby Doo? And is that…Shaggy (it wasn’t him! Or at least it wasn’t until it was. There are crossover episodes because both groups were Hannah Barbera characters)? What is going on?!

I was talking to a fellow old about it and he said especially back in the day, cartoonists would recycle characters. So the characters would be generally identical in appearance, with only small cosmetic changes, like hair color etc. Like, Josie and the Pussycats’ manager Alex was just a dark haired Josie’s boyfriend.

Me: That makes sense. Because Valerie looks exactly like Josie. Just, black.

Anyway. This year has been a LOT for all sorts of reasons that are not in the news (and the ones that have been in the news? JFC), and I needed a pick me up, so I decided to watch Barbie. Because I love it. It’s the girliest girl movie that ever girled. It’s PINK! Every girl is a Barbie! And every Barbie is DIFFERENT. AND DO YOU SEE WHERE THIS IS GOING? Because now I want to know: When did Mattel create a Black Barbie?

WELL. In 1968, Christie, Barbie’s best friend, arrived on shelves, and she is widely regarded as the company’s first original Black doll. AND they released a black version of Francie, Barbie’s cousin. But Francie and Christie merely cemented the idea that they were the sidekicks to the white and blonde Barbie. “This provoked the question that if Barbie is the ideal and the norm, what about the people who don’t look like that and who can’t dream and imagine themselves as Barbie?” At the time it felt very progressive to give Barbie a sassy Black friend. But when you speak to the people who wanted a Black Barbie at the time, all they got was a friend of Barbie.

It was these concerns that led to the founding of Shindana Toys in South Central Los Angeles. As one of the first toy companies to create and market Black dolls that looked like Black people, not just dolls that had been painted black instead of white, its goal was to improve representation in dolls and the self-image of Black children. In 1968, Shindana released Baby Nancy, a doll that became hugely popular in Los Angeles and was eventually sold across the country. Baby Nancy’s success only highlighted what Mattel was missing.

Mattel had debuted Barbie’s Dreamhouse and car in 1962. The accessories allowed the imaginations of those playing with the dolls to expand even further. You can drive Barbie to places and put her in her own home, all of which just allowed kids to think even more about where and who they could be (yannow. As long as they were white).

Kitty Black Perkins, who arrived at Mattel in 1976 and then became principal designer for Barbie in 1978, headed the push to diversify the doll line. Having never owned a Barbie doll until she bought one to prepare for her interview with Mattel, Perkins knew of the negative impact that the toy industry’s lack of representation had on children. She explains, “There was a need for the little Black girl to really have something she could play with that looked like her. I wanted her to reflect the total look of a Black woman.” When the first official Black Barbie doll was finally released by Mattel in 1980, her box read, “She’s Black! She’s beautiful! She’s dynamite!” She was specifically a Black Barbie, unlike the other Black dolls from the company that either had a different name or the same design as Barbie just with a darker skin tone.

Over the decades, Mattel took steps to ensure that Barbie would be “the most diverse doll line on the market,” according to a statement from the company. Dolls and toys have finally started to mirror “the diverse human experience.” But there is still progress to be made in helping young people see themselves in the toys that they play with, in any color AND any size (Barbie also comes in petite, “curvy”, tall and the original, Basic Barbie™)

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I’m never paying attention when I should be

February 4, 2025 //
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I have so many stories of being places I shouldn’t be because I was just not paying attention.

I’ve ended up in VIP sections (this one, I blame security for because they shoulda been asking themselves what random black women were doing in the VIP section with rock stars, but MY GUESS is that they decided if we were back there, we probably belonged there because WHY ELSE WOULD WE BE THERE? The answer is we were lost!)

I ended up in the Tenderloin and honestly “There but for the Grace of God go I”, because I stepped over people shooting up on the sidewalk and hid between two cars waiting for my rideshare that told me to walk there and wait for a car to pick me up and I am STILL mad about that because the fucking rideshare shoulda known that I was NOT LOCAL since it had all my damn information and honestly WHAT THE FUCK.

Of these two stories, the first one where I wasn’t worried I was gonna get murdered is my favorite.

BUT I have another one to add: the kind where I find a random Black History fact!

For the end of my birth month last year I went to New Orleans. Because I went for a quick day trip when I went on a cruise a few years ago, and I promised myself that I’d come back and spend some real time exploring the city. If you don’t know me, that means walking. I walked ALL over the French Quarter, and the Garden District. Got off the trolley somewhere in between just because I saw a band playing and when I’m on vacation I will absolutely let my curiosity lead.

I also met up with one of my internet pals because of course I did. We went to one of her local watering holes where I definitely drank too much (it was Halloween and still my birth month) and had so many regerts the next day. But the one thing I do NOT regret is going to one of the places that she recommended for breakfast. I went to the Buttermilk Drop Bakery! No this is not an ad, I’m just greedy and I wanna put y’all on.

Breakfast rice, bacon and a biscuit so good I’d slap a Georgia white woman. TWICE. [this may be a terrible photo but when I tell you this breffis was fie?!]

Anyway. We’d walked every place that we’d been eating this whole trip, but I didn’t know where this was, and it LOOKED too far to walk. So I decided we could rideshare there and if was close enough, we could just walk back after breakfast. But what had happened was as we were driving farther away from the French Quarter, I realized that we were much farther than I thought we were, and we were not going to be able to walk back because where even WERE we? My sissie: WTH were you doing in the 6th ward?! The answer was being greedy, tbh.

But the other answer was I was standing on Black History guys! Welcome to the first fact of Black History Month about the Oldest African American neighborhood in America. In the 18th and early 19th centuries, free persons of color and eventually enslaved Africans who obtained, bought or bargained for their freedom were able to acquire and own property in Tremé. The ability to acquire, purchase and own real property during an era when America was still immersed in slavery was remarkable and only in New Orleans did this occur with any regularity and consistency.

The Tremé neighborhood began as the Morand Plantation and two forts—St. Ferdinand and St. John. Near the end of the 18th century, Claude Tremé purchased the land from the original plantation owner. By 1794 the Carondelet Canal was built from the French Quarter to Bayou St. John, splitting the land. Developers began building subdivisions throughout the area to house a diverse population that included Caucasians and free persons of color. Tremé abuts the north, or lake, side of the French Quarter, away from the Mississippi River—”back of town” as earlier generations of New Orleanians used to say. Its traditional borders were Rampart Street on the south, Canal Street on the west, Esplanade Avenue on the east, and Broad Street on the north. Claiborne Avenue is a primary thoroughfare through the neighborhood. At the end of the 19th century, the Storyville red-light district was carved out of the upper part of Tremé; in the 1940s this was torn down and made into a public housing project. This area is no longer considered part of the neighborhood. The “town square” of Tremé was Congo Square—originally known as “Place des Nègres”—where the enslaved gathered on Sundays to dance. This tradition flourished until the United States took control, and officials grew more anxious about unsupervised gatherings of slaves in the years before the Civil War. [Hey did you know that there was a Jim Crow law that stated it was illegal for Black people to gather in groups of more than 5? That law no longer exists, but lemme just say that when you’re black, you’re never really lonely, because there will always be a white person. all up in your business. ]

The square was also an important place of business for slaves, enabling some to purchase their freedom from selling crafts and goods there. For much of the rest of the 19th century, the square was an open-air market. “Creoles of color” brass and symphonic bands gave concerts, providing the foundation for a more improvisational style that would come to be known as “Jazz”. At the end of the 19th century, the city officially renamed the square “Beauregard Square” after the French Créole Confederate General P.G.T. Beauregard, but the neighborhood people seldom used that name. Late in the 20th century, the city restored the traditional name of “Congo Square”.

In the early 1960s, in an urban renewal project later considered a mistake (that probably happened on purpose) by most analysts, a large portion of central Tremé was torn down. The land stood vacant for some time, then in the 1970s the city created Louis Armstrong Park in the area and named Congo Square within Armstrong Park. In 1994, the New Orleans Jazz National Historical Park was established here.

The neighborhood is viewed by many as ground zero for New Orleans culture. It’s the site of many major events that have shaped the course of Black America in the past two centuries. Filled with incredible history in terms of culture, music, and more, Tremé is arguably the most significant neighborhood in the whole city.

:::closes up all the websites I popped open to give y’all this information:::

Also. The buttermilk bakery is not a sit down restaurant and I didn’t know that until I got there, so I had to once again stand awkwardly on a corner while I waited for my rideshare to come pick me and my friend up and this is really why people don’t like to let me roam around the country without supervision. Yes, I know I said I was with a friend but that changes nothing because she also just stood there when I opened the door for a grown ass man, and said “get on in here, princess” so I’m not sure she counts as supervision.

ANYWAY.

Happy Monday! Happy February! Happy Black History Month! Please know that I’m keeping this month aggressively Black because every time somebody shares a Black History fact, a Black girl’s edges lay a little smoother.

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Let’s talk about sex, baby

March 1, 2024 //
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Because we’re all adults here right? [I don’t care what y’all say: I AM A GROWN]

And sex is for everyone, who, yannow, wants it AND IS CONSENTING AGE. And because I am an inclusive queen, I mean everyone. Abled and disabled alike.

IN [Black history] fact, did you know that one of sex toys greatest innovators was a Black man who created dildos with the disability community in mind?

Gosnell Duncan was paralyzed when a car fell on top of him while welding. He became involved in the disability rights movement in the late 1960s when he realized that there were many folks living with disabilities struggling to get their rocks off sexual urges met. The felt left out of the sexual revolution taking place all around them. In the early 70s, Duncan went to a seminar on sex and disabilities and left inspired to find a solution to living with disabilities and being able to experience sexual fire and desire [Did you know this is a 7 minute song?].

Dildos had already been invented, but were not accessible for people with disabilities.

The standard dildos available in the 1970’s were made with heat-treated rubber that would melt in the heat. Because of the material used to create them, these dildos often had a strong chemical odour that was off putting to people with scent sensory issues. He had often used silicone parts in his work on automobiles, and thought it would make a great dildo material.

As well as this, the dildos were sold in a pinkish white referred to as “flesh colored” reinforcing white skin as the default and othering anyone who’s skin did not match this tone.

As a disabled man with Caribbean heritage, Duncan knew what needed to be done to make his dildos stand out. By using silicone, Duncan’s toys were now hand washable. This meant that his toys could be used between sexual partners [I… you know what? nevermind]. He created toys for varying needs, including a toy for people with limited hand mobility that could be held with someone’s legs. And in a range of colors, in case your favorite color is blue. I hear people REALLY liked Avatar.

These were all groundbreaking steps that would positively alter the sex toy industry. Duncan’s dildos were also revolutionary for the feminist sexual movement, as his dildos did not always resemble a penis.

In a surprise to ALL of us, history has been largely told through a cis, white, able-bodied lens. And this reality means that you rarely (if ever) see disabilities portrayed in sex toy marketing. Which is unfortunate since the community that had such a positive impact on the sex toy industry has now been largely excluded from sex toy discourse. But now you know the next time you take a BIG OLE SNIFF of your dildo and it doesn’t smell like a tire (a rubber band? a condom? They didn’t say what KIND of rubber) you have Gosnell Duncan to thank for that.

And ME to thank for this fact. You’re welcome.

 

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Long, LONG ago

February 19, 2024 //
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[Please note that this is actually Friday’s fact, but I write these at work and we had a network outage so instead of fighting with my internet to get this fact sent out, I went home. And I don’t work on weekends kids.]

In the time before Uber, I went out with some friends/friends of friends on a Wednesday night for a birthday party because at the time I probably had around $20 in my wallet and I figured I couldn’t do too much damage on a school night with that amount of money. But what I didn’t account for is that these friends of friends would cover me [if you know me at all, you know why this was a mistake. If you DON’T know me, you should never underestimate my ability to procure a free drank], so what I thought was gonna be quick drop in where I had a beer and maybe a shot ended up being several rounds of Irish car bombs (the beverage, although to be fair, I definitely felt like wreckage and devastation the next day) and every variation of a Long Island Ice Tea (Long Beach, Tokyo…’member when you were VERY YOUNG AND STUPID and you mixed liquors? Me neither because if you drink like that you mostly black out).

And then, I stumbled home and slept for 10 minutes [I’m not really sure if it was REALLY 10 minutes or it FELT like 10 minutes] and went to work the next morning. TO BE FAIR, I did regret it deeply and at the end of the workday, I practically DOVE into my bed to make up for staying out all night drinking the day before.

But now I’m an adult (LOLOLOL….I am too you guys) and going out on a Wednesday leaves me V close to the same amount of tired, minus the hangover and smelling like the inside of a Jameson bottle. And this past Wednesday, I went to The Pantages to see a musical. I went to see The Wiz who lives in OZ but has taken up temporary residence in Hollywood. I’ve never seen a staged version of The Wiz IN PERSON. Although Imma be honest and tell y’all that I haven’t seen a version of The Wiz that I didn’t like including the one that aired in 2015.

DID YOU KNOW…that along with other musicals including Purlie (1971) and Raisin (1974), The Wiz was a breakthrough for Broadway, a large-scale big-budget musical featuring an all-Black cast?  It laid the foundation for later African-American hits such as Bubbling Brown Sugar (okay. This isn’t the musical but it is my SOLE reference for this song), Dreamgirls and Duke Ellington’s Sophisticated Ladies.

But there isn’t a foundation without a first. And you know why I’m here. To tell y’all how we got alllll the way to The Wiz’s all Black cast (headed for Broadway) from the FIRST BROADWAY MUSICAL*, which. Was named The Black Crook and I dunno man, Black is RIGHT THERE IN THE NAME, I feel like they missed an opportunity to do something but as always I’m sure the answer is racism  one way or another (it is because this was produced in 1866).

Anyway. The first all-black hit Broadway show, that is ALSO credited with inspiring the Harlem Renaissance of the 1920s and ’30s was called Shuffle Along. The show premiered at the 63rd Street Music Hall in 1921, running for 504 performances, a remarkably successful span for that decade. It launched the careers of Josephine Baker, Adelaide Hall, Fredi Washington and Paul Robeson, and was so popular it caused “curtain time traffic jams”.

Shuffle Along is a musical composed by Eubie Blake, with lyrics by Noble Sissle and a book written by the comedy duo Flournoy Miller and Aubrey Lyles. The show’s writers were African-American Vaudeville veterans who first met in 1920 at a NAACP benefit. None had ever written a musical, or even appeared on Broadway, and promoters were skeptical that Black people would like to see themselves reflected in the entertainment they consumed written and produced shows would appeal to Broadway audiences. After finding a small source of funding, Shuffle Along toured New Jersey and Pennsylvania. However, with its limited budget, it was difficult to meet travel and production expenses. Cast members were rarely paid, and were “trapped out of town when the box-office receipts could not cover train fare”.

The plot of Shuffle Along was based on Millers’ and Lyles’s previous play, “The Mayor of Dixie.”, and in Shuffle Along, they incorporated “their well-beloved characters that they had been playing for years in vaudeville”. Breaking with minstrel tradition, the principal characters wore tuxedos, conveying their dignity. In minstrel shows, characters in tuxedos and blackface typically played the “Zip Coon” type, a stock character which mocked black people who were free from slavery. Shuffle Along rejected this image by presenting its characters as community-oriented men seeking to run for mayor of their city. Furthermore, I would like to point out for BLACK PEOPLE in blackface allows them to  a)  access white audiences in the first place, in a medium white people are comfortable with and so can maybe hear/tolerate important, though provocative messages and b) stage a show that is at its core about an election. And we know that electoral and thus political rights are being had long been stripped from women and Black people 1921 was not a safe time to discuss voting rights.  But they are able to talk about the universal rights of all human beings under the “safety” of the ebony paint.

[THIS IS ME “BREAKING THE FOURTH WALL” TO STARE DIRECTLY AT YOU IN 2024 AKA AN ELECTION YEAR]

[This is also a reminder that even if you don’t want to vote for a president, SMALLER ELECTIONS COUNT TOO]

I’d argue that “safety” is relative because Black people were definitely still getting lynched in 1921 and the Emmitt Till Anti-Lynching Bill was finally passed in 2022. I’d ALSO like to say that the actual definition for lynching is to kill someone for an alleged offense with or without a legal trial, so what I’m saying that if you’re any sort of attention to world at large, you’ll note that lynching is still very much legal if you have on a certain outfit. That is generally blue.

Back to my fact. According to Time magazine, Shuffle Along was the first Broadway musical that prominently featured syncopated jazz music, and the first to feature a chorus of professional female dancers. They incorporated music and visual spectacle with the preexisting narrative to create a unique show. While stereotypes were indeed present, Sissle and Blake worked “within a parallel performance form,” replacing “the negative stereotypes with a vastly more positive image.”. In the end, Shuffle Along earned $9 million from its original Broadway production and three touring companies, an unusual sum in its time.

*closes Wikipedia*

And now I’m about to go see if I can find a copy of Shuffle Along to watch because it was on Broadway in 2016 (and was snubbed like WHOA and I wonder why? lolololol….no I don’t) and maybe there’s a bootleg copy so I can see what all the hubbub is about, bub.

Happy Monday! See you the next time I write a fact!

*The Black Crook has cautiously  been identified as the first popular piece that conforms to the modern notion of a musical.

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